What Do You Call It?

When I met with the RCMP in 2019 after reaching out for help, I repeatedly asked a couple of questions, and they refused to answer; in fact, they tried everything to steer me away from the topic, which I felt was the crux of why we were there. 

I asked the two senior members the following question: 

What is it called when you take a 15-year-old girl, cultivate her, use her for your benefit for years and then discard her?
Is there a name for that? In fact, boy or girl, is that remotely close to anything you know of as a police officer? (Repeatedly, refused to respond)

Back in my teens and early 20s, police were not allowed to commit any crimes in the course of their undercover work. It was with a wink and a nod that they would direct me into serious situations, saying, Remember, you can’t break the law either. 

The next questions I asked were as follows,

When you wanted intel on B&E artists, what did I have to endure or do to gain trust?
When you wanted intel on drug dealers, what did I have to endure or do to gain trust?
When you wanted intel on armed robbers, what did I have to endure or do to gain trust?
When you wanted intel on violent criminals, what did I have to do or endure to gain trust?
When you wanted intel on those who torture, those who kill, those who….
What demons do you think I have? 

I was there when the victims were victimized.  You carried out the body or made the arrest and went to a takedown party.

I asked for help to fix me; you blamed it all on me and victimized my family!

The bad guys had more honour – that is obscene!